Merge pull request #6 from Financial-Times/halp

HALP

bin/n-test.js

@@ -3,6 +3,8 @@
 
 let program = require('commander');
 
+const halp = require('../tasks/halp');
+
 program.version(require('../package.json').version);
 
 
@@ -15,9 +17,14 @@ program
 	.command('*')
 	.description('')
 	.action(function (app) {
-		// eslint-disable-next-line no-console
-		console.error(`The command ${app} is not known`);
-		process.exit(1);
+
+			if(app && app.toUpperCase().startsWith('HALP')) {
+				halp();
+			} else {
+				// eslint-disable-next-line no-console
+				console.error(`The command ${app} is not known`);
+				process.exit(1);
+			}
 	});
 
 

package.json

@@ -23,6 +23,7 @@
     },
     "homepage": "https://github.com/Financial-Times/n-test#readme",
     "dependencies": {
+        "chalk": "^2.3.0",
         "commander": "^2.13.0",
         "jest": "^22.0.6",
         "puppeteer": "^1.0.0"

tasks/halp.js

@@ -0,0 +1,57 @@
+const chalk = require('chalk');
+
+const messages = [
+	chalk`It\'s time to put the {bold FUN} back in function`,
+	chalk`'You can do this. Just {italic breath} ☺️`,
+	'GO GET EM TIGER 🐯A',
+	'It\'s not the number of lines of code we write, but the lines of code that take our breath away.',
+	'Life is not about the software we write, but the friends we make along the way',
+	'You\'re only as strong as the o-colors you mix, the o-tables you dance on and the o-friends you party with.',
+	'Code, laugh, love',
+	'Sing like no one is listening. Love like you\'ve never been hurt. Develop like nobody is debugging.',
+	'Every great developer you know got there by solving problems they were unqualified to solve until they actually did it.',
+	'"That brain of mine is something more than merely mortal, as time will show." - Ada Lovelace',
+	'"Testing leads to failure, and failure leads to understanding." - Burt Rutan',
+	'"Sometimes it\'s better to leave something alone, to pause, and that\'s very true of programming." - Joyce Wheeler',
+	'"Codes are a puzzle. A game, just like any other game." - Alan Turing',
+	'Write every function like it\'s your last.',
+	'You miss 100% of the bugs you don\'t make',
+	'Don\'t forget to debug yourself first',
+	'Believe there is good in your code.',
+	'Take a walk. Make some tea. Go talk to some of your awesome colleagues (but not in the kitchen).',
+	'Keep calm and curry on. (don\'t worry - nobody really knows what currying is)',
+	'Be the change request you want to see in the world.',
+	'Forget the module. What do YOU require?',
+	'Once upon a time, some idiot put display: none on the FT.com homepage on budget day. They survived. So can you.',
+	'If Slack can use 110% of CPU time, then so can you!',
+	'Think outside the box model.',
+	'If ever you feel like you\'re losing control, remember that there is a variant of you that\'s itching to take it.',
+	'git reset --HARD life',
+	'rm -rf all_of_your_problems',
+	'Polyfill your day with positivity!',
+	'In the end it\'s all just 1s and 0s.'
+
+];
+
+const characters = [
+	chalk`{bgRed \n (* ^ ω ^)\n}`,
+	chalk`{bgGreen \n٩(◕‿◕｡)۶\n}`,
+	chalk`{bgBlue \n(⌒ω⌒)\n}`,
+	chalk`{bgYellow \n(*^‿^*)\n}`,
+	chalk`{bgCyan \n(*¯︶¯*)\n}`,
+	chalk`{bgWhite.cyan \n٩(◕‿◕)۶\n}`,
+	chalk`{magenta \n(✯◡✯)\n}`,
+	chalk`{blue \n(ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*:･\n}`
+];
+
+
+const halp = () => {
+	const character = characters[Math.floor(Math.random()*characters.length)];
+	const message = messages[Math.floor(Math.random()*messages.length)];
+	// eslint-disable-next-line no-console
+	console.log(character);
+	// eslint-disable-next-line no-console
+	console.log(message);
+};
+
+module.exports = halp;

tasks/smoke.js

@@ -1,7 +1,5 @@
 const smokeTests = require('../lib/smoke');
 
-
-
 module.exports = (program) => {
 	program
 		.command('smoke')