The On1on

[mstem]

I HEREBY INVOKE MY RIGHTS...

As described in section 11.11.B of the BIFFUD Corporate Bylaws I hereby invoke
my rights as a sentient being who has not uploaded their mind to the cloud for consideration of this project application by the BIFFUD Hive Mind. With this
application I submit my interest in becoming a Member of BIFFUD and having this
project supported and adored by all who can 🤔.

Project Information

• Project Name: The On1on
• Project Haiku:

Some news is so dumb
It belongs in The Onion
So we put it there

• Project Analogy: It's like The Onion but with actual current events that are truly occurring in our world, the same one we have to live in every day.

Project Description

In 2013 or so Dan and I built this project to parody a parody newspaper. News from Not the Onion automatically populates our handy Onion template: http://theon1on.com/

Bylaw Questions

How is this project a bad idea?

Well, let's see.

• We already negotiated the legalese with the CEO of The Onion when he visited MIT Media Lab. The main point of contention was that we had accidentally stolen the expensive font they license from a fine font foundry. We've since replaced it with a less criminal font. Dan also offended their engineers by lazily hotlinking their images onto our site. But now that's fixed, too, and we're all good! Except that the company has been sold for parts like 4 times since this all went down. So maybe we'll get some more angry lawyer letters.

• Another reason this project is a bad idea is that its news comes from Reddit, where it occasionally picks up some regressive, misogynist, and/or xenophobic funk. Future work on the project, should anyone be inspired, could include a moderation queue for this news.

• And maybe even fixing the Justin Bieber twitter embed, which has been stuck on this one tweet from 21 February 2013: https://twitter.com/justinbieber/status/304554593331843072.

• The site's premier banner sponsor, http://newsjack.in/, links to a website and project that is no longer online.

The good news is that this site continues to attract thousands of unique views a month with literally no effort in the past ~5 years. This proposal is mainly to bring the project into the BIFFUD stable, put it on the website, and reimburse the annual domain fee.

If this project were a D&D Character, what alignment would it be and why?

Alignment (CHOOSE ONE):
Chaotic good

Where are the lulz?

Our cruel sad world continues to produce headlines like "Burn Injuries From Viral Boiling Water Challenge Sending People To The Hospital"

How does this project make people thinking face emoji?

This project forces people to reconsider the very idea of parody news by appropriating (fair use!) the brand and design of one of the most popular parody products around. And then those people need to reconsider whether parody is still funny if they live in a world more bizarre than the dark, twisted minds of comedy writers can even create. It's great!

Who is involved?

[For each member...]

• Name: Matt Stempeck

• Twitter: @mstem

• Github ID: @mstem

• Skillz: Had the idea, convinced Dan to do it rather than his graduate coursework, made a rose logo in the style of an onion that everyone always totally notices

• Project role / expectations: renewing the domain name until the day I die

• Project stake: %50

• Name: Dan Schultz

• Twitter: @slifty

• Github ID: @slifty

• Skillz: Built pretty much the entire thing, Belieber

• Project role / expectations: maaaaybe fixing the Twitter integration?

• Project stake: %50

Who will be the project's Comptroller?

Matt Stempeck

Is this realistic to implement via BIFFUD?

Yeah, it's had exactly 6 years to off-gas any noxious properties. Plus, ONE THOUSAND TWITTER FOLLOWERS: https://twitter.com/theon1on

Next Steps

1. Attend the next scheduled BIFFUD plotting session to plead your case.
2. If approved, we will create an entry for this project on BIFFUD.com, and work with anyone who would like to help refresh it for today's modern era.

How (often) will you be providing updates to the organization?

Updates will be action-oriented